Eagleopolis Falls: Helldivers 2 Players Defeat 2.5 Billion Squids in Super Earth Battle, Six Mega Cities Left to Defend

Okay, so here we go. I’ve got news, and you can decide if it’s good or bad. Helldivers 2 got a win by taking down over two billion – yep, that’s billion with a ‘b’ – Illuminate. What’s the catch? Eagleopolis still fell. So, mixed feelings, I guess.

Apparently, even if you throw a ton of Helldivers at the problem, it doesn’t mean one of Super Earth’s mega cities won’t get trashed. It’s kinda like assembling IKEA furniture—just ’cause you’ve got all the pieces doesn’t mean it’s gonna work out. Don’t sweat it, though. Maybe hug a buddy, watch some giant monster-surfing vids, if that’s your thing. Whatever helps, right?

There’s this thing about cookies needing to cooperate for content to show up, but, honestly, who even understands how that works?

Anyway, back on track. They tried defending with all they got—a whopping effort since that big Heart of Democracy update (which sounds optimistic just saying it). They took out 2.5 billion Illuminate, which sounds like a cause for celebration. Spoiler: it wasn’t.

Arrowhead, the studio behind this chaos, pretty much said, “Yeah, Eagleopolis is toast. Its shabby malls are now like dystopian postcards for what could happen everywhere else if we screw this up.” So, that doesn’t sound very cheery, does it?

One down, six to go, says Super Earth. People are still trying to get rid of the Illuminate fleet, at least. It’s not over yet—I think there’s still some hope floating around out there. Maybe? There’s chatter all over Twitter too, and who doesn’t love a good public lament?

Anyway, Arrowhead mentioned that the Illuminate fleet is still at 49% power, if percentages make this less abstract for anyone. There are six mega cities left, and they’re very much in danger. Rally the troops! Or at least, keep playing.

They’ve got this new aim—hit the Illuminate 20 million times. Does it make the falling city feel avenged? Debatable. But have you seen the game subreddit? Those folks are deep into their SEAF trooper fan art, so I doubt they’re too torn up right now.

So, are you crying over Eagleopolis? Or just laughing at the absurdity of it all? Drop your thoughts somewhere down… where thoughts usually go.